Back in 2016, Derek Sivers wrote about being a slow thinker. He explained that when someone asks him a deep question, his immediate response is “I don’t know.” His answer arrives a few days later.
It resonated. I’m a slow thinker too. And it’s the opposite of how most people respond to a question. We’ve been conditioned to give quick answers or confident reframes.
This is particularly true when speaking to clients who have hired us for our expertise. There's an expectation (or maybe it’s pressure I put on myself) that I’ll have all the answers.
Just the other day I was talking with a potential client. They asked a tough question, the kind I felt I should have an answer for on the spot.
I used to scramble around and attempt to say something coherent and intelligible, but really I was just voicing the first thought that came to mind.
Instead, I paused and said: “That’s a good question. Let me think on it and come back to you.”
The answer I provided the next day was better than anything I could have said in the moment. More considered, more useful, more honest.
Saying “I don't know, let me consider that” still makes me uncomfortable. I still feel as if I should have the answers locked and loaded. Pushing past the impulse to respond immediately with whatever comes to mind requires self-confidence and humility.
I’ve come round to the idea that saying “let me think on that” is a way of taking someone’s question seriously. It just requires giving yourself permission to think slowly.